(The Amazing) Frank
by Taffeh A. Llama
Summary: "Frank," Jason said calmly, "did you know that your girlfriend is crying?" Frank spat out his orange juice. / Hazel's just a tiny bit upset, and Frank's the only one that can cheer her up—by shape-shifting into as many animals as he could, of course. Frazel. One-shot. Sometime on the Argo II.


**Disclaimer: Do not own PJO! Also, I have no idea if I came up with this by myself, but I feel like I saw some sort of headcanon or fanart about this, because this idea should've been thought of before, right? If there is, please tell me so I can give credit where it's due. If not, then man, I'm proud of myself.**

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Frank walked into the mess hall with bleary eyes and bad bed head. He noticed that he was a bit later than usual since he had some demigod dreams plaguing his mind from the night before, but he saw Percy practically asleep in his bowl of cereal, so he couldn't have been that late, right? He shuffled his way to the buffet and chose a poached egg and bacon on toast to place on his tray. Afterwards, he picked up a plastic cup—demigods were not to be trusted with glass—and went to the soda machine Leo had invented.

It had an impressive amount of flavors ranging from Sprite to Jelly Bean and, strangely enough, blue Cherry Coke. Thankfully, it had regular beverages as well, and Frank was up for some orange juice. He pushed the "OJ" button, and out poured his drink. As he went for a sip, he noticed something—it wasn't as orange as it should have been.

Frank took a sniff and frowned. It was milk. Orange-colored milk. Leo must've tried pulling a prank on him, knowing he was lactose-intolerant. Sighing, he grabbed another cup and pressed the "LECHE" button this time, and his assumptions were right; Leo just switched the drinks around. Frank couldn't help but to think that it was too early for this _schist_.

And so, Frank sat down in the seat diagonal from Percy, and began eating. After he took a bite of toast, he felt Jason slide into the spot next him. Frank gave him a sort of nod, acknowledging his existence, before moving onto his orange juice to wash his toast down.

"Frank," Jason said calmly, "did you know that Hazel is crying?"

Frank spat out his orange juice, and Percy Jackson woke up.

"Annabeth?" he sputtered, bits of cereal flying out of his mouth.

Jason shook his head. "No, Hazel."

"Oh," Percy replied, rubbing his eyes. "Why she cryin'?"

Jason shrugged, and Frank felt very left out of the conversation. "I don't know. The girls won't tell me."

"Why's Frank not wit' her?" Percy slurred, still rubbing sleep out of his eyes and the milk in his eyebrows. "And where's Annabef? Annabef..." Still half-sleep, Percy left the table and continued to look for Annabeth.

Jason left the table too, and went over to the drinking fountain. He grabbed a plastic cup, filled it up, and managed to pour its contents on Percy before he walked into the wall. "She's with Hazel and Piper, you twit," Jason hissed.

Percy blinked and shook his head, willing himself dry. It was water. "Oh."

Rolling his eyes, Jason dragged the older demigod back to the table.

"Uh," Frank said, and when he felt two intense gazes staring back at him, he shrunk in his seat a little. "Nevermind?"

"Frank," Percy started out, folding his hands on the table. "You know what you have to do."

"Take a shower? Because I already did that last night and—"

Jason cut him off with a look, and, oh gods, Frank was rambling. And nervous. Very nervous. Why was he so nervous all of a sudden?

"Hazel's upset and it's your job to comfort her, like a _good_ boyfriend."

Percy nodded. "Take our advice, man. Trust me, I know girls." Thankfully, none of the people who knew Percy _before_ he started dating Annabeth were in the room. Otherwise, they would have all laughed.

"Okay," and that was all Frank said in reply. "So should I—"

"You guys talking about girls?" Frank froze. No, he didn't want his help on girls, not Leo out of all people. The son of Hephaestus swooped in and wrapped an arm around Frank's shoulders, barely meeting the end despite his lanky limbs. "Because I know a _lot_ about girls."

"The only thing you know how to do is turn them off, Leo, not help them," Jason pointed out, and Percy laughed and gave him a high-five.

Pouting, Leo sat down in a seat and took a bite of what else remained from Frank's toast. "I resent that. And this is really good toast."

"My toast," Frank grumbled, but he didn't have much of an appetite anymore, anyway. The hunger in his stomach twisted into something worse—worry. Frank knew he had to cheer up Hazel, but how? He wasn't exactly the most cheerful guy around.

"Okay, Frank," Percy said, placing a hand on the younger demigod's shoulder, shaking Frank out of his thoughts. "Don't mess up. This is your girlfriend we're talking about. Be cool. Be... be _amazing_."

Frank nodded furiously, sudden confidence flowing through his veins. "I can do this."

"Yeah," added Leo with a sly smile. "Hazel. Your girlfriend. Your love for her practically _ignites your bones_—" Frank then left the mess hall as fast he could, not wanting to hear the rest of Leo's speech, already feeling the blush forming on his cheeks, because what Leo was saying wasn't really far off. He made his way through the main passageway, counting the cabins on his left side.

_Coach Hedge_, he said to himself. _Annabeth, Piper... Hazel_. It was the last cabin before the girl's bathroom, and the door was slightly ajar. Peering in, he saw Annabeth and Piper worrying over Hazel, and Frank's heart practically broke. Hazel's small body was heaving up and down, racked in sobs, and Frank didn't think he'd ever seen her so distressed. Frank had half a mind to just barge in there and gather Hazel up in his arms, but he decided against it when he saw Annabeth's face staring at him, her lips pursed against her pointer finger.

Frank nodded in understanding and shifted his body away from the door. He had to be quiet. Frank could be quiet. A minute later, he could faintly hear Annabeth saying, "We'll be right back," and the sound of footsteps coming out. He side-stepped away from the door, waiting.

"You can do it Frank," he heard Piper whisper to him as she walked away, and Frank felt his heart beat really fast. Maybe there was a little magic in Piper's words-just to boost Frank's confidence bit more. He appreciated whatever help he could get.

"Don't screw up," was all Annabeth said to him and, yeah, that was pretty in character for her. And so, Frank took a deep breath, wiped his palms on his jeans, and went in the door. The moment his foot stepped into the room, Frank realized that he indeed could _not_ do it, and had several epiphanies.

1) Piper's magic already wore off, and Frank was practically shaking in his shoes.

2) The guys didn't even tell him _how_ to comfort Hazel, other than to be 'amazing', whatever that meant.

3) He was going in empty-handed—without any stuffed animals or chocolates or flowers or anything, really.

4) He was sweating more than usual.

This wasn't going to end well.

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When Frank walked in for real, and saw that Hazel's sobbing had diminished to sniffling and ragged breaths, he found himself wishing for Mars' blessing again.

"Hi," Frank simply said, and, wow, could that have been a worse thing to say? "I mean, are you okay?" Of course she's not, idiot. "I mean—"

Hazel laughed soft through a few tears. "Hi, Frank."

His shoulders drooped, and his face softened. "What happened?"

"Um," Hazel said, and laughed again. "I don't know, it just got a little bit too much." She shied away from Frank, as if she were embarrassed.

"You can tell me anything, you know?" Frank reassured, sitting next to Hazel. Close enough so their knees could touch, but Frank didn't have the guts to wrap his arm around her just yet. Hazel stared into his eyes for a moment, sighed heavily, and buried her face into Frank's chest. Frank blinked and found his arm automatically wrapping around Hazel's shoulders, his hands rubbing up and down her arm to comfort her. You go, Zhang. He could feel the slight courage pumping through his veins. Or were those heart palpitations? This wasn't the time to think about health problems.

"I know what'll make you feel better," Frank said firmly, and Hazel made a grunting noise that sounded like a _hm?_, so Frank decided to go through with his plan. He was going to transform into as many animals as he could and make Hazel laugh. It was a sure-fire plan to make her smile and feel better. Frank didn't know if he could shapeshift into animals on a whim yet, but he had better control over his abilities than he did before, so it wasn't going to hurt him if he tried his best. Hopefully.

"Stay here," and Frank replaced himself with a big pillow for Hazel to hug while he did his... tricks? He got off the bed with a creak, placing himself a foot or two away from Hazel. He took a deep breath. He had to be amazing. Well, as amazing as he could be.

Frank faintly remembered Hazel calling him a handsome elephant, so maybe he should try that first?

He imagined an elephant in his head, an elephant running around in the plains, an elephant drinking water—Frank immediately felt his nose stretch and, man, was _that_ a weird feeling. It was easier and more comfortable than the last time he turned into an elephant, and before he knew it, he was a majestic gray beast.

Taking a small step forward, he shook his head, feeling his ears flap around, and opened his mouth into the best elephant-smile he could. He felt somewhat amazing—he liked elephants—but then felt not as amazing when he saw Hazel's tilted head and questioning eyes. Wait, when did Frank barely reach the bed?

Frank trumpeted, and he heard a high pitched sound. Oh gods, Frank wasn't a beast. He was a baby elephant. No wonder Hazel was so confused, and no wonder she was so _big_. Miraculously, Frank stayed calm and tried to get up on the bed to cuddle Hazel. Elephant cuddles were awesome, right?

Wrong.

When Frank lifted one leg onto the sheets, he somehow lost his balance—elephants were not meant to be bipedal—and fell right on his elephant butt. He even did a somersault as he trumpeted in distress.

Hazel hadn't responded yet, and Frank could hear her hiding giggles into her pillow as he laid on his side, and could elephants die of embarrassment? Frank's scared now, he doesn't even know why, and before he knew it, he shape-shifted into another animal. Frank felt his body compress and oh, ow, that hurt. Shaking his head, he looked down and stared at furry feet with little claws. He looked up this time and now Hazel was even bigger, and he could hear really well. Frank took a cautious step forward and involuntarily squeaked.

Hazel screamed.

_Schist_, Frank was a mouse. Hazel hated mice. Frank never asked for this. What animal could he be now? Something he knew well, something that wasn't a rodent or overly furry and—

Apparently, his brain already knew what he wanted to be before Frank was able to realize. His body expanded this time—what a workout—and his stomach felt bloated. He felt heavy and like he wanted to sleep forever and chew away at... bamboo? Frank was craving bamboo.

He was a panda. He remembered seeing a whole lot of them lounging around that one time he went to the zoo. Did he have some sort of connection with pandas? Well, Frank _was_ Asian, but that's beside the point. Everyone liked pandas, right? Pandas were nice and gave great hugs. Hazel was going to get and amazing bear hug by Frank—pun wholeheartedly intended.

And so, Frank tried to stand up, but accidently fell back, feeling the ship tremble slightly under his weight. (He was a _giant_ panda after all.)

"Lay off the cheeseburgers, big guy," he heard Leo crackle over the intercom, and Frank growled. If Leo was a stick of bamboo, Frank would snap it right in half. And in half again. Until Leo was in sixteenths. Then he'd scatter the Leo-pieces all across the ground so no one could ever find him again.

Frank blinked. Being a panda made him overly aggressive. And feeling so heavy made him feel awkward. His ears pressed against his skull and he yawned. Tired, too. Shape-shifting took a lot out of him, but, it didn't look like Hazel was okay yet, so Frank had to keep on trying. He had to be amazing.

An animal that's light. That can move fast. Lots of energy, but isn't annoying like Leo. Frank knew the perfect animal. He imagined he was back in Alaska, the cold biting his skin, his feet slipping on ice. Curling in on himself, he felt his paws elongate and become skinnier, his face scrunching up and his nose stretching again. Boy, his body sure was getting a workout from this.

He blinked and squawked, flapping his wings. Flippers, he should say. Flippers. He waddled around the wooden floor on his claws and squawks again. This time, he heard Hazel laugh. Frank felt like grinning, but he wasn't sure how to do that with a beak. Instead, he decided to waddle forward to Hazel and do some cool penguin-tricks, until _someone_ (read: Leo) suddenly swerved the Argo II, causing Frank to trip on his legs and fall—really, how many times was he going to fall?

Either way, he was sliding across the floor on his belly, and he couldn't stop himself. He hit the walls and cabinets with awkward cries, and he felt Hazel's eyes on the whole time as she giggled. _This isn't going to work,_ Frank thought to himself as he nearly hit the edge of Hazel's bed. _She's supposed to be laughing with me, not at me. Go to Hades, Valdez, you—_

Gods forbid that _penguins_ were violent too. Frank needed a non-violent animal. One that had great balance and couldn't slide around. And a cute one. Flopping onto his back to stop sliding, Frank closed his eyes and imagined tall grass and burrows and carrots. Mmm, carrots.

Frank wiggled his ears. He couldn't do that as a human. He hopped toward Hazel tentatively, and Hazel cooed. Awesome. His paw thumped onto the ground, and Hazel cooed again.

"You make a cute bunny, Frank." Even _more_ awesome. Frank hopped up and down in place, in circles, in squares, in triangles, even in hexagons. If Hazel liked animals that could jump, then Frank knew the perfect animal. Turning around, he wiggled his little cotton tail at Hazel—he felt rather adventurous, okay?—as he shape-shifted into his last animal.

When Frank saw Hazel's face when he turned into a frog, he felt like croaking—literally and metaphorically. Maybe he should've stuck to cute animals, but frogs were cute, right? Frogs were as cute as bunnies, at least in Frank's book.

"Frank," Hazel gasped and cast her pillow aside, picking froggy Frank up in her hands. "I _love_ frogs." Okay, so this was going better than he expected. Frank croaked in response as if to say _Yeah, this was my whole plan all along_. He had to go through all the other animals for the big finale. Well, that's what Frank was going to tell Hazel if she ever asked about his peculiar choices.

"My favorite story is the Princess and the Frog," Hazel told Frank with a big smile. No wonder Frank felt such a need to turn into a frog. His subconscious knew, somehow. He recalled Hazel reciting the story by heart a week or two ago when they were alone and couldn't sleep. Hazel pet his head with her forefinger. Frank didn't even know if frogs _could_ be pet, but it felt good.

"Maybe if I kiss you, you'll turn back into human?" she said with an arched brow. This was much better than expected. Frank didn't know how to say yes in frog, so he blinked awkwardly. Frog eyes were weird. He'd never been a frog before. "I'll take that as a yes."

And then Frank felt Hazel set him down on the bed, and Hazel's lips on his little froggy head, and Frank took that as his cue to turn back into normal, demigod Frank. There he was sat on the bed, beaming at Hazel. With a soft smile, Frank gave her a hug, wrapping his arms around her and pressing Hazel to his chest. "You're my princess, Hazel." And he thanked the gods for his voice being normal and not like Kermit the Frog's.

Hazel smiled against Frank's neck and kissed him on the cheek. "I feel so much better. You're amazing, Frank."

And, yeah, Frank had to admit that he maybe kind of was.

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**AN: Look, guys! My first Frazel! The fandom needs more of these cuties, okay?**

**OJ and LECHE.**

**~Taffeh**


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